Dadgum Hollywood...

So, since I've been home, I've been spending part of my time watching Hallmark/Lifetime Christmas movies. You know, the kind where the girl had her heart broken by some guy and, all of the sudden, some guy shows up just in time for Christmas to sweep her off her feet. Yeah, those movies.

Well, watching these movies has made me realize that I'm the girl in the movie. At least partially. Secretly, deep down inside, I'm waiting for some guy to show up and just make things better and heal my broken heart. However, at the same time, I'm also the girl sitting here, yelling at my tv, "This doesn't happen in real life! Stop lying to me!"

As much as I want to believe that this will happen to me one day and I wish that it would even happen this Christmas, I still don't believe that this business actually happens to real people. Then, I also have to confront my belief that God won't give me a guy like that because I want him so badly. I have to confront my secret belief that God doesn't really want to give me the things that I want. It's like I believe that he's waiting to take away everything that makes me happy and is keeping this relationship that I want more than anything away from me to keep me unhappy.

Obviously, when I think more realistically, I know that God will never keep anything from me if it is not for my own good. I might not understand His reasoning, but I don't have to. I have to learn to trust His judgment and realize that He knows what is best for me. Also, I can trust in a God who did not create me to be completed and satisfied by a man. As much as I trust men in my life like my father and Josh, I also recognize that any human man will let me down sometimes. Luckily for me, and you of course, God will never let me down, even when I do not trust Him.