If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in a library?

Today, I decided that it would be a good idea to get a perm.

That should be funny enough on its own.


Roommate quote of the day: "I am in charge of initiation! I am sacred!" (we're fairly certain that she actually meant "scared")

It's my party and I'll cry if I want to (except that it really isn't my party and I wasn't crying)

Let me tell you a little bit about my weekend. It all began when I agreed to sing in my roommate's cousin's wedding. Got that? Roommate's cousin's. Anyway, I assume that it's going to be some typical, sappy love song like "From This Moment" (which I may or may not have actually practiced, just in case). Oh, no. No, no, the song was "There is Love" by Captain and Tenille. I want to know, by show of hands, who in the holy world has heard of Captain and Tenille? And what is he the captain of anyway? I also want to mention that this song was not designed for sopranos.

Of course, I'm a soprano.

Anyway, I practice the song a few times in the days leading up to the wedding. Although the song is low, I manage it pretty well. Finally, the big day arrives. And I don't have a voice. I mean, nothing comes out when I open my mouth. Consequently, the drive to the wedding (which was in the middle of the boondocks. Fun Fact: the middle of the boondocks is Neeses, SC, in case anyone ever asks you), is spent screaming to warm up my voice and clear my throat, as well as gargling Coke Zero, which ended up bubbling out of my mouth and down my front.

Beautiful.

I arrive, I practice, everything seems to be at least halfway decent. I get up, I sing, I sit back down and think that I've made it. I performed the most ridiculous song on the face of the earth and came out alive. I even thought that maybe it was actually pretty good.

Until a small boy came up to me at the reception and asked me why it sounds like I'm crying when I sing. FML.


Roommate quote of the day: (in reference to the copious amounts of time she spends on facebook) "I'm not facestalking, I'm faceloving!"

"That joke came from the top of my head, and the top of my head ain't funny" - Mitch Hedburg

I created this blog in the hopes of being half as awesome and witty as Ashton & Amanda in their blog Life in the Smyth Lane. Alas, nothing quite as weird and odd happens to me. Well, at least not in the 8 hours it has been since I was made aware of this fantastic spectacle of clever writing.

Anyway, I did decide today that you know you picked the wrong college when the dining hall sucks so much that you regularly dine on a selection of cheese, sunflower seeds, and olives. Together. In a bowl. Not mixed in a salad, but tossed half-heartedly into the primary-colored bowl of the day (today was yellow, I believe). Tonight, however, I had a special treat: the cheese was provolone.

I also have this crazy roommate who says really funny things (inadvertently) pretty regularly. I think that I shall end each post with a Roommate Quote of the Day.

Roommate Quote of the Day: "A little bit of naughty can go a long way."